Selfvertroue

Jou selfvertroue is hoe jy oor jouself voel. Dit word in ’n groot mate gevorm deur jou persoonlike ervarings (byvoorbeeld, jou verhoudings met jou ouers en jou broers/susters, hoe met jou portuurgroep oor die weg kom, en hoe jy jouself met ander vergelyk).

Lae selfvertroue kan ander areas in ’n mens se lewe – hoofsaaklik jou beroep en jou studie – op verskillende maniere raak:

• Jou selfvertroue bepaal die ywer waarmee jy jou studie en jou loopbaan aanpak. Byvoorbeeld, as jy nie glo dat jy in staat is om ’n sekere module te slaag nie, sal jy nie tyd afstaan om daarvoor te studeer nie, omdat jy sal dink, “Wat help dit tog – ek gaan druip, maak nie saak wat ek doen nie”.
• As jou lae selfvertroue veroorsaak dat jy heeltyd vir jouself sê jy het nie die vermoë om jou kwalifikasie te voltooi nie, dan sal enige struikelblokke wat jy in jou studie mag teëkom, vir jou ’n bevestiging wees dat jy ’n mislukking is.
• Selfs wanneer jy die soort probleme ervaar wat normaal is vir alle studente, sien jy dit as ’n bewys dat jy bestem is om te misluk.
• Jy bestee hope tyd en energie daaraan om bewyse te kry wat jou oortuiging staaf dat jy nie suksesvol gaan wees nie – totdat daardie oortuiging uiteindelik ’n werklikheid word.
• Wanneer jy iets goed doen of wanneer jy positiewe resultate kry, ontken jy dit – jy vind dit dus moeilik om te aanvaar dat positiewe dinge in jou lewe kan gebeur.
• Wanneer daar ’n geleentheid oor jou pad kom, is jy só bang jy gaan misluk, dat jy nie die kans aangryp nie.
• Jy straal ’n negatiewe houding (teenoor jouself en ander) uit. Jy vind dit moeilik om ander se sterk punte na waarde te skat, en jy is krities teenoor hulle. Dit het ’n uitwerking op die manier waarop jy met ander omgaan.
• Jy sal nie kanse waag om jou loopbaan te bevorder nie, omdat jy dink jy sal nie suksesvol wees nie. Jy sal byvoorbeeld nie vir ’n internskap aansoek doen nie omdat jy oortuig is dat jy nie gekies sal word nie, al voldoen jy aan al die vereistes.
• Jy is altyd gemoeid met hoe ander jou sien, en jy sal nie met jou dosent praat of ander mense vir hulp of inligting vra nie, omdat jy meen hulle sal dink jy is dom.

Aan die ander kant, as jy ’n gesonde selfbeeld het:

• aanvaar jy jouself vir wie jy is en erken jy dat daar dinge is wat jy goed doen en dinge waarmee jy nie so goed is nie
• gebruik jy jou sterk punte in een area om jou selfvertroue in ander areas op te bou
• erken jy daardie dinge omtrent jouself wat mense waardeer en gebruik jy dit as bevestiging om areas te ontwikkel waar jy voel jy het ruimte om te groei
• glo jy dat jy jou beoogde loopbaandoelwitte kan bereik en span jy jou energie en hulpbronne in om vir jou ideale te werk. Jy voel gemaklik daarmee om met ander te praat oor jou studieverwante probleme en jy bestuur jou studie proaktief
• kan jy geleenthede raaksien en aangryp omdat jy glo dat jy ’n bydrae kan lewer. Jy is in staat om ander te help om jou potensiaal in te sien en jy verstaan hoe ander tot jou ontwikkeling kan bydra

Hoe bou ek ’n gesonde mate van selfvertroue op?

Stap een: Bou aan jou selfvertroue

Stap twee: Gaan tot aksie oor

Dit is tyd om risiko’s te neem en te toets wat jy kan doen sodat jy die resultate van jou handelinge kan sien. As jy byvoorbeeld graag inligting oor jou beroep wil hê, stuur vir jou dosent ’n e-pos en kyk wat die reaksie is.

Namate jy meer risiko’s neem, sal jy ’n verandering in jou houding opmerk, wat betref hoe jy uitdagings en jouself sien. Jy sal begin besef dat struikelblokke en probleme nie op mislukking dui nie, maar eerder daar is sodat jy meer oor jouself kan leer en kan ontdek.

Stap drie: Aanvaar jou mislukkings

Om sukses te behaal, moet jy mislukkings as deel van die proses kan aanvaar. Jou mislukkings definieer jou nie as ’n persoon nie. Selfs wanneer jy faal, moet jy nie voel dat jy ’n mislukking is nie. Leer uit die ervaring, en probeer weer. Hou jou drie sirkels (loopbaan, studie en persoonlike lewe) in gedagte en maak seker dat jy dié sirkel waar jy meer positiewe ervarings het, gebruik om die ander te beïnvloed.

Dit kan byvoorbeeld wees dat jy in jou studie goeie resultate behaal en bewys dat jy bekwaam is. Tog voel jy miskien ongemotiveerd elke keer wanneer jy aan jou familiesituasie dink. Probeer aan maniere dink hoe dit ’n positiewe invloed op jou loopbaan kan hê as jy sukses in jou studie behaal – kan dit jou hoop gee dat jy ’n goeie werk kan kry en sodoende jou familie se situasie in die toekoms kan verander?

Stap vier: Fokus op dié dinge wat jy kan beheer

As jy eerder dink oor die dinge wat jy kan beheer (byvoorbeeld, jou studie en hoe sukses in jou studie jou loopbaan positief kan beïnvloed), kan jy die gevoel van hulpeloosheid ten opsigte van jou familiesituasie teenwerk. Wanneer jy fokus op die dinge wat jy kan beheer, skep jy vir jouself ’n positiewe lewensuitkyk en is jy meer geneig om jou lewe sowel as ander mense in ’n positiewe lig te beskou.

Verdere hulpbronne vir selfvertroue

Het jy ’n behoefte om met iemand te gesels?

Leer meer oor die ondersteuningsdienste aangebied deur Unisa se Direktoraat vir Voorligting en Beroepsontwikkeling en hoe om ’n voorligter te kontak vir ’n gesprek.

Go itshepa

Go itshepa ga gago go ka ga gore o ikutlwa jang ka wena. Go bopiwa thata ke maitemogelo a gago a sebele (sekai, dikamano magareng ga gago le batsadi ba gago le ba o tsalwang nabo, kamano ya gago le balekane nao, le ka moo o itshwantshang le ba bangwe ka gona).

Go tlhoka go itshepa go ama dikarolo tse dingwe tsa botshelo jwa gago, bogolo segolo tsela ya gago ya tiro le dithuto tsa gago, ka ditsela di le mmalwa:

• Go itshepa ga gago go laola maiteko a o a tsenyang mo dithutong le tiro ya gago. Sekai, fa o sa dumele gore o tlaa kgona go falola mojule o o rileng, ga o ne o tsaya nako ya go ithuta gonne o tlaa bo o ntse o akanya, “Go thusang – ga ke tle go falola, le fa nka dira eng”.
• Fa e le gore ka ntlha ya go se itshepe o nna o ipolelela gore o ka se ke wa kgona go fetsa dithuto tsa gago, mathata mangwe le mangwe a o kopanang nao mo dithutong tsa gago a go tlhomamisetsa gore o a palelwa.
• Tota le fa o itemogela mathata a a tlwaelegileng mo baithuting botlhe, o bona seno e le bosupi jwa gore wena o tlile go palelwa.
• O tsaya nako e ntsi tota le go dirisa maatla o kokoanya bosupi jo bo tshegetsang tumelo ya gago ya gore ga o tle go atlega, moo e leng gore e bile tumelo eo e feleletsa e le nnete.
• Fa o dira sentle gongwe o bona dipholo tse di siameng, ga o di dumele. Ga go nne bonolo mo go wena go amogela gore o ka diragalelwa ke dilo tse dintle mo botshelong jwa gago.
• Fa o newa tšhono, ga o e dirise ka ntlha ya go tshaba go palelwa.
• O iteba ka molebo o o sa siamang mme o leba le ba bangwe fela jalo. Ga go nne bonolo mo go wena go akgola maatla a ba bangwe, mme o a ba kgala. Seno se ama ka moo o amanang le ba bangwe ka gona.
• Ga o ne o tsaya matsapa a go itokafatsa gonne o akanya gore ga o ne o atlega. Sekai, ga o ne o dira kopo ya boithutelatirong gonne o ipoleletse gore o ka seke wa tlhophiwa, le fa tota o fitlhelela ditlhokego tsotlhe.
• O nna o tshwenyegile ka gore batho ba bangwe ba go tsaya jang mme ga o ke o bua le motlhatlheledi gongwe go kopa thuso gongwe tshedimosetso mo bathong ba bangwe gonne o akanya gore ba tlaa tsaya gore o sematla.

Ka fa go je lengwe, fa o na le boipono jo bo siameng:

• O ikamogela jaaka o ntse mme o tlhaloganya gore go na le dilo tse o di dirang sentle le dilo tse o sa di direng sentle jalo.
• O dirisa maatla a gago mo karolong e nngwe go aga go itshepa mo dikarolong tse dingwe.
• O amogela dilo tse batho ba go akgolelang tsone mme o di dirisa go itshegetsa fa o ntse o godisa dikarolo tse o bonang o sa ntse o ka gola mo go tsona.
• O dumela gore o ka fitlhelela maikemisetso a o a eletsang a tiro mme o dirisa maatla le ditlamelo go dira go lebisa kwa phitlhelelong e o e batlang. O sosologa go bua le ba bangwe ka mathata a gago a amanang le dithuto mme o kgona go laola seemo malebana le go tsamaisa dithuto tsa gago.
• O kgona go lemoga le go dirisa ditšhono, gonne o dumela gore o ka kgona go akgela. O kgona go thusa ba bangwe go tlhaloganya bokgoni jwa gago mme o amogela gore ba bangwe ba ka akgela mo kgolong ya gago.

Nka aga jang go itshepa go go siameng?

Kgato ya ntlha: Aga go itshepa ga gago

Seno se simola ka ditiragatso tse dinnye, tse di diregang. Fa o amogela ditshwaelo ka ditiragatso tsa gago, lemoga dilo tse di siameng le tse o tlhokang go tsaya nako ya go di tokafatsa. Iphe nako letsatsi le letsatsi go kwala dilo tse o di dirileng mo letsatsing le le fetileng tse o ipelang ka tsona le dilo tse o batlang go di dira ka tsela e e farologaneng.

Kgato ya bobedi: Tsaya kgato

Ke nako ya go lekeletsa mme o bone gore o ka dirang gore o bone dipholo tsa dikgato tsa gago. Sekai, fa o batla tshedimosetso ka tiro ya gago, romela emeile kwa motlhatlheleding wa gago ka dipotso mme o bone gore tsibogo e tlaa nna efe.

Fa o ntse o lekeletsa, o tlaa lemoga phetogo mo melebong ya gago malebana le ka moo o bonang dikgwetlho ka gona le ka moo o iponang ka gona. O tlaa simolola go lemoga gore dikgoreletsi le mathata ga di amane le go palelwa, fela di gona go go letla go ithuta le go ribolola dilo tse dintšhwa ka ga gago.

Kgato ya boraro: Amogela go palelwa ga gago

Gore o atlege, o tlhoka go kgona go amogela go palelwa jaaka karolo ya tirego. Go palelwa ga gago ga go tlhalose se o leng sona. Tota le fa o paletswe, se dumele gore go palelwa go kaya gore o motho yo o palelewang. Ithute mo maitemogelong ao, mme o leke gape. Re rata gore o nne o akanya ka didiko tsa gago tse tharo (tselana ya tiro, dithuto le botshelo jwa sebele) mme o netefatse gore o dirisa sediko se o nang le maitemogelo a a siameng thata mo go sona go tlhotlheletsa tse dingwe.

Sekai, go ka direga gore mo dithutong tsa gago, o bona dipholo tse di siameng mme o ipontsha gore o ka kgona. Fela, o kgobega marapo nako nngwe le nngwe fa o akanya ka seemo sa kwa lapeng. Akanya ka ntlha ya gore o a atlega mo dithutong tsa gago mme seo se ka tlhotlheletsa tselana ya gago ya tiro – a seno se ka go naya tsholofelo ya gore o tlaa kgona go bona tiro e e siameng mme wa fetola seemo sa lelapa la gaeno mo isagong?

Kgato ya bone: Tsepamisa maikutlo mo dilong tse o ka kgonang go di laola

Go akanya thata ka tse o kgonang go di laola (sekai, dithuto tsa gago le ka moo go atlega mo dithutong tsa gago go ka nnang le tlhotlheletso e e siameng ka teng mo tirong ya gago) go go kgontsha go fokotsa go ikutlwa o felelwa ke tsholofelo malebana le seemo sa lelapa la gaeno. Fa o tsepamisa maikutlo mo dilong tse o ka kgonang go di laola, o nna le molebo o o siameng ka wena, mme o bona botshelo jwa gago le batho ba bangwe ka leitlho le le siameng.

A o tlhoka go bua le mongwe?

Ithute go le gontsi mo support services offered e e rebolwang ke Lefapha la Unisa la Tshidilomaikutlo le Tlhabololo ya Ditiro (Unisa Directorate for Counselling and Career Development) le how to contact a counsellor go buisana.

Boitshepo

Boitshepo bja gago ke ka moo o ikwago ka gona ka wena. O ba le boitshepo ka lebaka la maitemogelo a bophelo bja gago (mohlala, tswalano ya gago le batswadi ba gago le banabeno, ka moo o tswalanago le dithaka le ka moo o ipapetšago ka gona le ba bangwe).

Go inyatša go na le khuetšo godimo ga dikarolo tše dingwe tša bophelo bja gago, kudu-kudu mošomong wa gago le dithutong tša gago ka ditsela tše mmalwa:

• Boitshepo bja gago bo laetša maikemišetšo a gago go dithutong le mošomong wa gago. Mohlala, ge o sa dumele gore o tla kgona go atlega go motšulo wo o itšego, o ka se ithute, ka ge o tla be o ipotša gore, “Mohola wa go bala ke eng – ke tlile go palelwa, go sa kgathalege gore ke dira eng”.
• Ge e le gore ka lebaka la go hloka boitshepo o tšwela pele ka go ipotša gore ga o na bokgoni bja go fetša lengwalo la gago la dithuto, ge o kopana le mathata go thuto ya gago o tlile go ipotša gore se se ra gore o ka se tšwelele thutong ya gago.
• Le ge o itemogela mehuta ya mathata ao a tlwaelegilego go baithuti ka moka, o bona se bjalo ka bohlatse bja gore o tlile go palelwa.
• O fetša nako e ntši kudu le maatla o kgoboketša bohlatse bja go thekga tumelo ya gago ya gore o ka se atlege, go fihla moo tumelo yeo e bago nnete.
• Ge o dira dilo gabotse goba ge o hwetša dipoelo tše di botse, o a di latola. O hwetša go le boima go amogela gore dilo tše di botse di ka direga bophelong bja gago.
• Ge o hwetša monyetla, o a o tlogela ka lebaka la go boifa go palelwa.
• O tšweletša maikutlo a mabe ka wena le go ba bangwe. O hwetša go le boima go lemoga bokgoni bja ba bangwe, gomme o ba swaya diphošo. Se se ama ka mokgwa wo o tswalanago le batho.
• O ka se tšeye magato a go amana le kgolo ya gago mošomong ka gore o gopola gore o ka se atlege. Mohlala, o ka se dire kgopelo ya go ithutela mošomo ka gore o dumela gore o ka se kgethwe, le ge o fihlelela dinyakwa ka moka.
• O dula o tshwenyegile ka gore batho ba bangwe ba nagana eng ka wena gomme o ka se bolele le mofahloši goba wa kgopela thušo goba tshedimošo go batho ba bangwe ka ge o ipotša gore ba tla nagana gore o setlaela.

Ka go le lengwe, ge o na le boitshepo:

• O ikamogela ka mokgwa wo o lego ka gona gomme o amogela gore go na le dilo tšeo o di dirago gabotse le dilo tšeo o sa di dirego gabotse.
• O šomiša bokgoni bja gago bja se sengwe go ba le boitshepo go dikarolo tše dingwe.
• O amogela dilo tšeo batho ba di ratago ka wena gomme o di šomiša bjalo ka tlhohleletšo go hlabolla dikarolo tše o bonago di hloka go kaonafatšwa.
• O dumela gore o ka fihlelela dinepo tša gago tša mošomo gomme o šomiša maatla le didirišwa tša gago go fihlelela pono ya gago. O kgona go bolela le ba bangwe ka mathata a o kopanago le wona go thuto ya gago gomme o tšeakarolo go taolo ya dithuto tša gago.
• O kgona go lemoga le go šomiša menyetla, ka ge o dumela gore o ka kgona go kgatha tema. O kgona go thuša ba bangwe go kwešiša bokgoni bja gago gomme o thabela ka moo ba bangwe ba kgathago tema go kgolo ya gago.

Ke godiša bjang boitshepo bja maemo a mabotse?

Kgato ya pele: Godiša boitshepo bja gago

Thoma ka go dira dilo gannyane. Ge o hwetša dipoelo ka dilo tše o di dirilego, ela hloko dilo tše di botse le dilo tšeo o swanetšego go di kaonafatša. Iphe nako letšatši le lengwe le le lengwe go ngwala dilo tšeo o di dirilego gabotse letšatši la go feta gomme o ikgantšha ka tšona le dilo tše o ka ratago go di dira ka tsela e nngwe.

Kgato ya bobedi: Tšea kgato

Ke nako ya go tšea kgato go bona dilo tše o ka kgonago go di dira gore o bone dipoelo tša se o se dirilego. Mohlala, ge o nyaka tshedimošo mabapi le mošomo wa gago, romela mofahloši wa gago emeile o mmotšiše dipotšišo, gomme o lete dikarabo.

Ka go tšea kgato, o tla lemoga phetogo ka maitshwaro a gago go ya ka mokgwa wo o iponago le ka moo o bonago mathata ka gona. O tla thoma go lemoga gore ditšhitišo le mathata ga di kgokagane le go palelwa, eupša di ba gona go go fa monyetla wa go ithuta le go lemoga dilo tše dimpsha ka wena.

Kgato ya boraro: Amogela dilo tše di go palelago

Gore o kgone go atlega, o swanetše go kgona go amogela gore go palelwa ke karolo ya tshepedišo. Go palelwa ga gago ga go go hlaloše bjalo ka motho. Le ge o palelwa, o se ke wa dumela gore go palelwa go ra gore o tla dula o palelwa. Ithute go tšwa go maitemogelo ao, gomme o leke gape. Re nyaka gore o gopole dikarolo tše bohlokwa tša bophelo bja gago tše tharo (mošomo, dithuto le bophelo bja gago) gomme o netefatše gore o šomiša karolo moo o nago le maitemogelo a mabotse a mantši a go huetša ba bangwe.

Mohlala, e ka ba gore dithutong tša gago o hwetša dipoelo tše di botse gomme o bontšha gore o na le bokgoni. Le ge go le bjalo, o ka nyama mooko nako le nako ge o nagana ka maemo a lapa la geno. Nagana ka fao taba ya gore o atlega dithutong tša gago go ka bago le khuetšo e botse mošomong wa gago – naa se se ka go dira gore o be le kholofelo ya gore o ka kgona go hwetša mošomo o mobotse le go ka kgona go fetola maemo a lapa la geno nakong ye e tlago?

Kgato ya bone: Tsepamiša kgopolo go dilo tše o ka kgonago go di laola

Go nagana kudu ka dilo tšeo o ka di laolago nako le nako (mohlala, dithuto tša gago le gore go atlega dithutong tša gago go tla ba le khuetšo e botse mošomong wa gago) go go kgontšha go fokotša go nyamiša ke maemo a lapa la geno. Ge o ela šedi dilo tše o kgonago go di laola, o ipona ka tsela e maleba, gomme o bona bophelo bja gago le batho ba bangwe ka tsela e botse kudu.

Methopo e mengwe ka boitshepo

O hloka motho yo o ka bolelago le yena?

Ithute ke botlalo ka support services offered tšeo di abiwago ke Unisa Directorate for Counselling and Career Development le how to contact a counsellor go ba le poledišano.

Ho itshepa

Ho itshepa ha hao ke hore na o ikutlwa jwang ka wena. E boptjwa ka tekanyo e kgolo ke diphihlelo tsa hao tsa botho (mohlala, dikamano tsa hao le batswadi ba hao le bana beno, kamoo o amnang le dithaka tsa hao, le ka moo o ipapisang le ba bang).

Ho itshepa ho tlaase ho na le tshusumetso dikarolong tse ding bophelong ba hao, haholoholo mosebetsing wa hao le dithutong tsa hao, ka ditsela tse ngata:

• Boitshepo ba hao bo laola boiteko boo o bo etsang dithutong tsa hao le mosebetsing wa hao. Mohlala, haeba o sa dumele hore o tla kgona ho pasa mojule o itseng, o ke ke wa qeta nako o ntse o ithuta, kaha o tla be o ntse o nahana, "Ke eng e thusang - ke tla hloleha, ho sa tsotellehe hore na ke etsa eng".
• Haeba ka lebaka la ho se itshepe ha hao o dula o ipolella hore ha o kgone ho qeta dithuto tsa hao, mathata afe kapa afe ao o kopanang le ona dithutong tsa hao a sebetsa e le bopaki ba hore o hlolehile.
• Esita le ha o thulana le mefuta ya mathata a tlwaelehileng ho baithuti bohle, o bona sena e le bopaki ba hore o a hloleha.
• O qeta nako e ngata le matla o bokella bopaki bo tshehetsang tumelo ya hao ya hore o ke ke wa atleha, hoo tumelo e bang nnete.
• Ha o etsa dintho hantle kapa ha o fumana ditholwana tse ntle, wa di hana. O fumana ho le thata ho amohela hore dintho tse molemo di ka etsahala bophelong ba hao.
• Ha o fuwa monyetla, ha o o sebedise ka lebaka la tshabo ya ho hloleha.
• O bontsha maikutlo a fosahetseng mabapi le wena le ba bang.O fumana ho le thata ho ananela matla a ba bang, mme wa ba tshwaya diphoso. Sena se na le phello tseleng eo o amanang le ba bang ka yona.
• O ke ke wa ipeha kotsing ho ntshetsa pele mosebetsi wa hao hobane o nahana hore o ke ke wa atleha. Mohlala, o ke ke wa etsa kopo ya kwetliso ya mosebetsi hobane o kgodisehile hore o ke ke wa kgethwa, le hoja o finyella ditlhoko tsohle.
• O dula o tshwenyehile ka hore na batho ba bang ba o tadima jwang, mme o ke ke wa bua le morupelli kapa wa kopa thuso ho batho ba bang kapa tlhahisoleseding hobane o nahana hore ba tla nahana hore o sethoto.

Ka lehlakoreng le leng, haeba o na le setshwantsho se phetseng hantle:

• O ikamohela seo o leng sona, mme wa dumela hore ho na le dintho tseo o di etsang hantle le tseo o sa di etseng hantle.
• O sebedisa matla a hao sebakeng se seng ho haha boitshepo ba hao dikarolong tse ding.
• O ananela dintho tseo batho ba di ananelang ka wena mme o di sebedisa e le tiiso ya ho ntlafatsa dibaka tseo o ikutlwang hore o na le sebaka sa ho hola.
• O dumela hore o ka kgona ho fihlela dipheo tseo o di batlang mosebetsing, mme o sebedisa matla le disebediswa tsa hao ho sebeletsa ho fihlela pono ya hao. O phutholohile ho bua le ba bang ka mathata a hao a amanang le thuto tsa hao mme o mafolofolo tabeng ya ho laola dithuto tsa hao.
• O kgona ho lemoha le ho sebedisa menyetla, kaha o dumela hore o kgona ho kenya letsoho. O kgona ho thusa ba bang ho utlwisisa bokgoni ba hao mme o ananela kamoo ba bang ba ka kenyang letsoho ntlafatsong ya hao.

Nka etsa jwang hore ke be le tekanyo e loketseng ya ho itshepa?

Mohato wa pele: Theha boitshepo ba hao

Sena se qala ka diketso tse nyenyane, tse sebetsang. Ha o ntse o fumana maikutlo mabapi le diketso tsa hao, ela hloko dintho tse ntle le tseo o hlokang ho qeta nako o di ntlafatsa. Sebedisa nako letsatsi ka leng o ngola dintho tseo o di entseng letsatsing le fetileng tseo o ka bang motlotlo ka tsona le tseo o ka ratang ho di etsa ka tsela e fapaneng.

Mohato wa bobedi: Nka bohato

Ke nako ya ho ipeha kotsing le ho leka seo o ka se etsang e le hore o bone diphello tsa diketso tsa hao. Mohlala, haeba o hlile o batla tlhahisoleseding mabapi le mosebetsi wa hao, romella imeile ho morupelli wa hao ka dipotso mme o bone hore na karabo ke efe.

Ha o ntse o ipeha kotsing, o tla hlokomela phetoho ya maikutlo a hao mabapi le tsela eo o tadimang mathata le wena. O tla qala ho hlokomela hore ditshitiso le mathata ha di amane le ho hloleha, empa ho e na le hoo di teng ho o dumella ho ithuta le ho sibolla dintho tse ntjha ka wena.

Mohato wa boraro: Amohela mefokolo ya hao

E le hore o atlehe, o lokela ho kgona ho amohela ho hloleha e le karolo ya tshebetso. Ho hloleha ha hao ha ho o hlalose jwaloka motho. Le ha o hloleha, o se ke wa dumela hore ho hloleha ho bolela hore o hlolehile. Ithute ho tswa phihlelong, mme o leke hape. Re batla hore o hopole didikadikwe tsa hao tse tharo (mosebetsi, dithuto le bophelo ba motho) mme o etse bonnete ba hore o sebedisa sedikadikwe moo o nang le diphihlelo tse monate ho susumetsa ba bang.

Mohlala, e ka nna ya ba dithutong tsa hao, o fumana ditholwana tse ntle mme o iponahatsa o e-na le bokgoni. Leha ho le jwalo, o ka nna wa ikutlwa o nyahame nako le nako ha o nahana ka boemo ba lelapa la hao. Nahana hore na taba ya hore ebe wa atleha dithutong tsa hao e ka ba le tshusumetso e ntle jwang mosebetsing wa hao - na see se ka etsa hore o be le tshepo ya hore o tla kgona ho fumana mosebetsi o motle mme o fetole boemo ba lelapa la hao nakong e tlang?

Mohato wa bone: Tsepamisa maikutlo dinthong tseo o ka di laolang

Ho nahana haholoanyane ka dintho tseo o ka di laolang (mohlala, dithuto tsa hao le kamoo ho atleha dithutong tsa hao ho tla ba le tshusumetso e ntle mosebetsing wa hao) ho o nolofalletsa ho fokotsa maikutlo a ho hloka thuso ho latela maemo a lelapa la hao. Ha o tsepamisa maikutlo dinthong tseo o ka di laolang, o iketsetsa maikutlo a nepahetseng, mme o tadima bophelo ba hao le batho ba bang ka tsela e nepahetseng haholwanyane.

Disebediswa tse ding tsa ho itshepa

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Ithute ha holwanyane ka ditshebeletso tsa tshehetso tse fanwang ke Botsamaisi ba Unisa bakeng sa Tlhabollo le Ntlafatso ya Mosebetsi le mokgwa wa ho ikopanya le moeletsi ho ba le moqoqo.

Ukuzethemba

Ukuzethemba kwakho yindlela ozizwa ngayo ngawe uqobo. Yakhelwe phezulu kwezinga eliphezulu lesipiliyoni sakho uqobo (ngokwesibonelo, ubuhlobo bakho nabazali bakho nezingane zakini, indlela oxhumana ngayo nontanga, nendlela oziqhathanisa ngayo nabanye).

Ukuzethemba okuphansi kunomthelela kwezinye izindawo empilweni yakho, ikakhulukazi umsebenzi wakho kanye nezifundo zakho, ngezindlela eziningi:

• Ukuzethemba kwakho kunquma umzamo owenzayo ezifundweni zakho nasemsebenzini wakho. Isibonelo, uma ungakholwa ukuthi uzokwazi ukuphumelela imojula ethile, ngeke uchithe isikhathi ufunda, ngoba uzobe ucabanga ukuthi, "Kuyini ukusetshenziswa - ngizohluleka, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ngenzani".
• Uma kungenxa yokungazethembi kwakho ulokhu uzitshela ukuthi awukwazi ukuqeda iziqu zakho, noma yibuphi ubunzima ohlangabezana nabo ezifundweni zakho zenza isiqinisekiso sokuthi uyisehluleki.
• Ngisho noma uhlangabezana nezinhlobo zezinkinga ezivamile kubo bonke abafundi, lokhu ukubona njengobufakazi bokuthi angeke uphumelele.
• Uchitha isikhathi esiningi namandla uqoqa ubufakazi obusekela inkolelo yakho yokuthi angeke uphumelele, kuze kufike ezingeni lokuthi inkolelo iba yiqiniso.
• Uma wenza kahle izinto noma uthola imiphumela emihle, uyaphika. Ukuthola kunzima ukwamukela ukuthi izinto ezinhle zingenzeka empilweni kwakho.
• Uma unikezwa ithuba, awulisebenzisi ngenxa yokwesaba ukwehluleka.
• Ukhombisa isimo sengqondo esingesihle ngawe nabanye. Ukuthola kunzima ukwazisa amandla abanye, futhi uyabagxeka. Lokhu kunomthelela endleleni ohlobana ngayo nabanye.
• Angeke uzibeke engcupheni yokuthuthukisa umsebenzi wakho ngoba ucabanga ukuthi angeke uphumelele. Isibonelo, angeke ufake isicelo somfundi oqeqeshwayo osebenza enhlanganweni ngoba uqinisekile ukuthi angeke ukhethwe, nakuba uhlangabezana nazo zonke izidingo.
• Uhlala ukhathazekile ngokuthi abanye abantu bakubona kanjani futhi angeke ukhulume nothisha noma ucele usizo kwabanye abantu noma ulwazi ngoba ucabanga ukuthi bazocabanga ukuthi uyisiphukuphuku.

Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma unesithombe sakho esinempilo:

• Uyazamukela ngalokho oyikho futhi uyavuma ukuthi kunezinto ozenza kahle kanye nozenza kahle kodwa kancane.
• Usebenzisa amandla akho endaweni eyodwa ukwakha ukuzethemba kwakho kwezinye izindawo.
• Uyazazisa izinto abantu abazithokozelayo ngawe futhi uzisebenzise njengesiqinisekiso sokuthuthukisa izindawo lapho unomuzwa wokuthi unendawo yokukhula.
• Ukholelwa ukuthi ungakwazi ukufeza izinhloso zakho zomsebenzi owufisayo futhi usebenzise amandla akho nezinsizakusebenza ukuze ufeze umbono wakho. Ukhululekile ukukhuluma nabanye ngezinkinga zakho ezihlobene nokufunda futhi umatasa mayelana nokuphatha izifundo zakho.
• Uyakwazi ukubona nokusebenzisa amathuba, njengoba ukholelwa ukuthi uyakwazi ukufaka isandla. Uyakwazi ukusiza abanye baqonde amandla akho futhi uyakwazisa ukuthi abanye bangaba neqhaza kanjani ekuthuthukisweni kwakho.

Ngilakha kanjani izinga elinempilo yokuzethemba?

Istebhu sokuqala: Yakha ukuzethemba kwakho

Lokhu kuqala ngezenzo ezincane, ezingokoqobo. Njengoba uthola impendulo mayelana nezenzo zakho, qaphela lezo zinto ezinhle kanye nalezo zinto okudingeka uchithe isikhathi uzithuthukisa. Chitha isikhathi usuku ngalunye ubhala phansi izinto ozenze ngosuku olwedlule ongaziqhenya ngazo kanye nezinto ongathanda ukuzenza ngendlela ehlukile.

Istebhu sesibili: Thatha isinyathelo

Yisikhathi sokuthatha ubungozi futhi uhlole ukuthi yini ongayenza ukuze ubone imiphumela yezenzo zakho. Isibonelo, uma ufuna ngempela ulwazi ngomsebenzi wakho, thumela i-imeyili kumfundisi wakho enemibuzo futhi ubone ukuthi ithini impendulo.

Njengoba ubhekane nobungozini, uzobona ushintsho esimweni sakho sengqondo mayelana nendlela ozibuka ngayo izinselele kanye nawe ngokwakho. Uzoqala ukuqaphela ukuthi izithiyo nezinkinga azixhumene nokwehluleka, kodwa kunalokho zikhona ukukuvumela ukuthi ufunde futhi uthole izinto ezintsha ngawe.

Istebhu sesithathu: Yamukela ukwehluleka kwakho

Ukuze uphumelele, udinga ukwazi ukwamukela ukwehluleka njengengxenye yenqubo. Ukwehluleka kwakho akukuchazi njengomuntu. Noma wehluleka ungakholwa ukuthi ukwehluleka kusho ukuthi uyisehluleki. Funda kokuhlangenwe nakho, bese uzama futhi. Sifuna ukuthi ugcine engqondweni imibuthano yakho emithathu (umsebenzi, izifundo kanye nempilo yomuntu uqobo) futhi uqiniseke ukuthi usebenzisa umbuthano lapho uthola khona isipiliyoni esihle ukuze ube nomthelela kwabanye.

Isibonelo, kungenzeka ukuthi ezifundweni zakho, uthola imiphumela emihle futhi uzibonakalisa ukuthi unekhono. Nokho, ungase uzizwe udelelekile njalo uma ucabanga ngesimo somndeni wakho. Cabanga ukuthi iqiniso lokuthi uphumelela ezifundweni zakho lingaba nomthelela omuhle kanjani emsebenzini wakho - lokhu kungakwenza ube nethemba lokuthi uzokwazi ukuthola umsebenzi omuhle futhi kungashintsha isimo somndeni wakho esikhathini esizayo

Istebhu sesine: Gxila ezintweni ongakwazi ukuzilawula

Ukucabanga okwengeziwe ngezinto ongakwazi ukuzilawula (isibonelo, izifundo zakho nokuthi ukuphumelela ezifundweni zakho kuzoba nomthelela omuhle kanjani emsebenzini wakho) kukwenza wehlise umuzwa wokungabi nakuzisiza mayelana nesimo somndeni wakho. Uma ugxila ezintweni ongakwazi ukuzilawula, uzenzela wena umbono omuhle, futhi ubheke impilo yakho nabanye abantu ngendlela eyakhayo.

Izinsiza ezengeziwe zokuzethemba

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Kutetsemba

Kutetsemba kumayelana nekutsi utiva njani wena ngebunguwe. Kutsintfwa kabanti nguloko lohlangabetene nako (sibonelo, budlelwane bakho nebatali bakho nebantfwana bakini, kutsi ukhulimisana njani nabontsanga yakho, nekutsi uticatsanisa njani nalabanye.)

Kuba nelizinga lekutetsemba leliphasi kunelifutse kuletinye tindzawo temphilo yakho, ikakhulu emsebentini nasetifundvweni takho, ngentindlela letinyenti:

• Kutetsemba kwakho kuncuma umtamo lowufakako etifundvweni nasemsebentini wakho. Sibonelo, uma ngabe awukholwa kutsi utawuyiphasa imojuli letsite, angeke ucitse sikhatsi udadisha, ngoba utawube ucabanga kutsi, “Kutangisita ngani – ngitawufeyila, akukhatsaleki kutsi ngentani”.
• Uma ngabe ngesizatfu sekungatetsembi uhlala njalo utitjela kutsi ange ukhone kuphotfula ticu takho, nanoma ngubuphi bulukhuni lohlangabetana nabo etifundvweni takho kuvele kube sicinisekiso sekutsi wena usehluleki.
• Ngisho noma ngabe uhlangabetana netinkinga letetayelekile kuto tonkhe titjudeni, wena loko ukubona njengebufakazi bekutsi vele umiselwe kufeyila.
• Ucitsa sikhatsi nemandla lamanyenti uhlanganisa bufakazi bekwesekela kutsi vele angeke uphumelele, kute kufike esigabeni lapho khona lenkholelo iba liciniso.
• Uma tintfo utenta kahle noma uma ngabe utfola imiphumela lemihle, uyayiphika. Ukutfola kumatima kwemukela kutsi kukhona lokuhle lokungenteka emphilweni yakho.
• Uma unikwe litfuba, awulisebentisi ngoba wesaba kwehluleka.
• Utikhombisa wena kanye nalabanye simongcondvo lesingakhi. Ukutfola kulukhuni kujabulela emakhono alabanye, futsi awuvumelani nalabanye. Loku kunemtselela endleleni lokhulumisana ngayo nalabanye.
• Angeke wente tintfo letinebungoti kute utfutfukise umsebenti wakho ngoba ucabanga kutsi angeke uphumelele. Sibonelo, angeke ufane sicelo sekuceceshelwa umsebenti emsebentini ngoba ukholelwa ekutsini angeke bakukhetse, ngisho noma ngabe uhlangabetana nato tonkhe tidzingeko.
• Uhlala njalo ukhatsateka ngekutsi labanye bantfu bakutsatsa kanjani futsi angeke sewuze ukhulume nemfundzisi noma labanye bantfu mayelana nekutfola lusito noma lwatiso ngoba ucaba kutsi batawucabanga kutsi usilima.

Ngakulolunye luhlangotsi, uma ngabe utibona ume kahle:

• Utemukela ngalendlela longiyo nekwemukela kutsi kunetintfo longatenta kahle kakhulu kantsi futsi kukhona naleto longatenta kahle kancane.
• Usebentisa emandla akho kuyinye indzawo wakhe kutetsemba kwakho kuletinye tindzawo.
• Uyatemukela tintfo bantfu labatijabulelako ngawe futsi utisebentise njengesiciniseko sekutfutfukisa tindzawo lova kutsi ufanele kutsi utitfutfukise.
• Ukholelwa ekutsini ungayizuza imigomo yakho loyifunako yemsebenti bese usebentisa emandla akho nemitfombolusito kute uzuze umbononchanti wakho. Uyakhululeka kukhuluma nalabanye mayelana netinkinga tekufundza kwakho futsi uphakamela etulu kusenesikhatsi ulawule tifundvo takho.
• Uyakhona kubona nekusebentisa ematfuba, ngobe ukholwa kutsi uyakhona kufaka ligalelo. Uyakhona kusita labanye bavisise emandla akho futsi uyakujabulela kutsi labanye bangalifaka kanjani ligalelo ekutfutfukeni kwakho.

Ungalakha kanjani lizinga lelihle lekutetsemba?

Sinyatselo sekucala: Yakha kutetsemba kwakho

Loku kucala ngetento letincane, letentekako. Ngesikhatsi utfola umbiko ngetento takho, caphela tintfo letinhle kanye naleto lodzinga kucitsa sikhatsi kuto utilungisa. Citsa sikhatsi lilanga ngalinye ubhala phasi tintfo lotente ngayitolo longatigcabha ngato kanye netintfo longatsandza kutenta ngendlela leyehlukile.

Sinyatselo sesibili Tsatsa sinyatselo

Sikhatsi sekwenta intfo lebungoti uphindze futsi uhlole loko longakhona kukwenta kute kutsi ubone imiphumela yetento takho. Sibonelo, uma ngempela ufuna lwati ngemsebenti wakho, tfumela kumfundzisi wakho i-imeyili lenemibuto uphindze futsi ubone kutsi itsini imphendvulo.

Ngesikhatsi wenta intfo lebungoti, utawuba luntjintjo kusimongcondvo sakho mayelana nendlela lobuka ngayo tinsayeya kanye nawe lucobo lwakho. Utawucala kubona kutsi tihibe netinkinga atichumani nekwehluleka, kepha esikhundleni saloko tikhona kute kutsi tikwente ufundze futsi utfole letitsite ngawe .

Sinyatselo sesitsatfu: Yemukela kwehluleka kwakho

Kute kutsi uphumelele, udzinga kutsi ukwati kwemukela kwehluleka njengencenye yemphumelelo. Kwehluleka kwakho akuchazi wena njengemuntfu. Ngisho noma ngabe uyehluleka, angakholelwa ekutsini kwehluleka kwakho kusho kutsi usehluleki. Fundza kuloko lohlangabetene nako, uphindze wetame futsi. Sifuna kutsi uhlale wati tindingilizi takho letintsatfu (umsebenti, tifundvo kanye nemphilo yakho) bese wenta siciniseko sekutsi usebentisa indingilizi lona lokunyenti kuyo lohlangabetene nako lokuhle kute kutsi kufake loku lokunye umtselela.

Sibonelo, kungaba kutsi etifundvweni takho, utfola imiphumela lemihle futsi utikhombisa kutsi uyakhona. Nanoma kunjalo, ungativa uphelelwa ngumdlandla ngaso sonkhe sikhatsi uma ucabanga ngesimo semndeni wakho. Cabanga ngeliciniso lekutsi kuphumelela etifundvweni takho kungaba nemtselela lomuhle emsebentini wakho – loku kungakwenta yini kutsi ube nelitsemba lekutsi utawutfola umsebenti lomuhle bese ukhona kuntjintja simo semndeni wakho esikhatsini lesitako?

Sinyatselo sesine: Gcila etintfweni longakhona kutilawula

Ucabanga kakhulu ngetintfo longatilawula (sibonelo, tifundvo takho nekutsi kuphumelela kwakho etifundvweni takho kutawuba nemtselela lomuhle emsebentini wakho) kukwenta ukwati kunciphisa umuva wekutiva kute longatentela kona ngekuya kwesimo semndeni wakho. Uma ugcila etintfweni lokhona kutilawula, wakha simo lesikuvunako , uphindze futsi ubuke imphilo yakho neyalabanye bantfu ngendlela leyakhako.

Leminye imitfombo mayelana nekutetsemba

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Ukuzethemba

Ukuzethemba kwakho kuyindlela ozizwa ngayo wena. Kubunjwe khulukhulu malemuko wakho (ukwenza isibonelo, ubudlelwano bakho nababelethi bakho kanye nabantwana bekhenu, indlela ozwana ngayo nabangani bakho, begodu nendlela ozifanisa ngayo nabanye).

Ukungazithembi kunomphumela omumbi kwezinye iindawo epilwenakho, kuhlekuhle ebizelweni lakho neemfundweni zakho, ngokweendlela ezimbalwa:

• Ukuzithemba kwakho kuqunta umzamo owenzako eemfundweni zakho nebizelweni lakho. Ukwenza isibonelo, nangabe awukholwa bona uzakukghona ukuphasa imojula ethileko, angeze wathatha isikhathi esinengi ufunda, ngombana uzabe ucabanga, bona “Kusizani – ngizokufeyila, nanyana ngingenzani”.
• Nangabe ngesimanga sokungazithembi kwakho uragela phambili nokuzitjela bona uyabhalelwa kuqedelela ikhwalifikhetjhenakho, eminye neminye imiraro ohlangabezana nayo eemfundweni zakho isebenza njengesiqiniseko sokuthi vele uyabhalelwa.
• Nalokha nangabe uhlangabezana nemihlobo yemiraro ejayelekileko kibo boke abafundi namkha amastjudeni, ubona lokhu njengobufakazi bokuthi vele uzokubhalelwa.
• Uthatha isikhathi esinengi usebenzise ne-eneji enengi ubuthelela ubufakazi bokusekela ikolelo yakho yokuthi angeze uphumelele, bekufike lapha lokho okholelwa kikho kuba liqiniso.
• Lokha nawenza izinto kuhle namkha nawuthola imiphumela emihle, awuyivumi. Uba nobudisi bokwamukela bona izinto ezihle zingenzeka epilwenakho.
• Lokha nawunikelwa ithuba, awulisebenzisi ngokuthi uthukwe uzitjele bona uzokubhalelwa.
• Utjengisa umukghwa omumbi kuwe nakwabanye. Uthola kubudisi ukobana uthabele lokho okwenziwa ngabanye abantu, uyabanyefula ngasosoke isikhathi. Lokhu kungaba nomphumela omumbi ngokwendlela ophilisana ngayo nabanye abantu.
• Angeke wakghona ukulinga izinto ekutheni uphumelelise ibizelo lakho ngombana ucabanga bona angeze uphumelele. Ukwenza isibonelo, angeze wafaka isibawo sokuyokubandulelwa amakghono ngesimanga sokuthi vele uzitjele bona angeze ukhethwe, nalokha nangabe uhlangabezana nazo zoke iindingo ezifunekako.
• Ngaso soke isikhathi utshwenyeke ngendlela abanye abantu abakubona ngayo begodu angeze ukhulume nelektjhara namkha ubawe isizo namkha ilwazi kwabanye abantu ngombana ucabanga bona bazakucabanga bona usudlhadlha.

Ngakwelinye ihlangothi, nangabe unesithombe esinepilo:

• Uzamukela njengombana unjalo begodu wamukele bona kunezinto ozenza kuhle nalezo ongazenzi kuhle khulu.
• Usebenzisa amandlakho kwenye indawo ukwakha ukuzithemba kwakho kwezinye iindawo.
• Uthokozela izinto abantu abazithabelako ngawe bese uzisebenzisa njengesiqinisekiso ukobana uthuthukise iindawo lezo ocabanga bona ungakghona ukwenza ngcono kizo.
• Ukholwa bona ungazuza iminqophakho ohlose ukuyizuza begodu usebenzisa i-enejakho neensetjenziswa zakho ekutheni usebenzele ibhudangwelo. Utjhaphulukile nawukhuluma nabanye abantu ngemiraro ephathelene neemfundo zakho begodu uba majadu naziza ekulawuleni iimfundo zakho.
• Uyakghona ukulemuka begodu usebenzise amathuba, njengombana ukholwa bona uyakghona ukwenza umnikelo. Uyakghona ukusiza abanye ukobana bazwisise ikghono lakho begodu uyayithabela indlela abanye abantu abangafaka isandla ngayo ekuthuthukeni kwakho.

Ngilakha njani izinga elinepilo lokuzethemba?

Igadango lokuthoma: Yakha ukuzethemba kwakho

Lokhu kuthoma kancani, izenzo ozijayeza zona. Lokha nawuthola umbiko obuyako ngezenzo zakho, yelela lokho okungokuhle begodu nalezo zinto ekufanele uthathe isikhathi sakho ukobana uzithuthukise. Thatha isikhathi sakho qobe lilanga utlole izinto ozenze elangeni eligadungileko ongazikhakhazisa ngazo nalezo ongafuna ukuzenza ngendlela ehlukileko.

Igadango lesibili: Sikima wenze

Sikhathi sokobana usikime wenze begodu uhlole bona khuyini ongakghona ukukwenza ukuze ubone imiphumela yezenzo zakho. Ukwenza isibonelo, nangabe kwamambala ufuna ilwazi ngebizelo lakho, thumela i-imeyili kulektjharakho uthumele imibuzo ubone bonyana uzokuphendula athini.

Lokha nawusikimako, uzakubona itjhuguluko ngokwendlela oziphatha ngayo naziza endleleni obona ngayo iintjhijilo Kanye nendlela wena ozibona ngayo. Uzakuthoma ukulemuka bona iinqabo nemiraro ayihlangani nokubhalelwa, kodwana kunalokho iba khona ukukuvumela bona ufunde begodu uthole izinto ezitja ngawe.

Igadango lesithathu: Yamukela ukubhalelwa kwakho

Ukuze uphumelele, kufanele wamukele ukubhalelwa kwakho njengengcenye yekambiso. Ukubhalelwa kwakho akuhlathululi wena njengomuntu. Nalokha nawubhalelwako, ungakholwa bona ukubhalelwa kutjho khona bona uyabhalelwa. Funda ngelemuko lakho, bese uyazama godu. Sifuna ukobana ukhumbule iiyingilizi zakho ezintathu (ibizelo, iimfundo nepilwakho) bese wenza isiqiniseko sokobana usebenzisa isiyingilizi lapha unamalemuko amanengi amahle khona ukobana ube nomthelela kwezinye.

Ukwenza nje isibonelo, kungaba ngileso seemfundo zakho, lapha uthola khona imiphumela emihle begodu utjengisa ukuba nenkghono. Yeke, ungazithola uphelwa mamandla ngaso soke isikhathi nawucabanga ngobujamo bomndenakho. Cabanga ngokuthi indaba yokobana uyaphumelela eemfundweni zakho ingaba nomthelela omuhle kangangani ebizelweni lakho – ingabe lokhu kungakwenza ube nethemba lokobana uzakukghona ukuthola umsebenzi utjhugulule nobujamo bomndenakho esikhathini esizako?

Igadango lesine: Tjheja izinto ongakghona ukuzilawula

Ukucabanga ngezinto ongakghona ukuzilawula (ukwenza isibonelo, iimfundo zakho nokobana ukuphumelela eemfundweni zakho kuzakuba nomthelela omuhle njani ebizelweni lakho) kwenza bona ukghone ukususa umuzwa wokubhalelwa naziza ebujameni bomndenakho. Nawutjheja izinto ongakghona ukuzilawula, wenza bona uqaleke kuhle nawe, begodu ubone ipilwakho nabanye abantu ngendlela ehle khulu.

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