We experience anxiety, stress, or tension at some or other stage in our lives. If we do not cope with it immediately and deliberately, it might overwhelm us and immobilise us for the tasks that we have to perform. Therefore it is necessary to know about the effects of anxiety, stress, and tension and how we can cope with them.
These terms are often used as synonyms. According to the dictionary, anxiety refers to a state of being anxious about imminent danger; being excessively uneasy and concerned about the future. Anxiety, however, is usually not linked to a specific person, situation, or experience which is feared. It is a vague, undefined, tense feeling of dread that one experiences and which is difficult to control.
Stress refers to an effort or demand upon physical or mental energy. Stress produces the same feelings as anxiety but it is usually linked to a specific person, situation, or experience that one fears, for example, an examination, an assignment, or a superior person. Tension, on the other hand, refers to mental strain or excitement; a strained state or relationship. If the symptoms are experienced acutely, they are referred to as panic attacks.
All these definitions have in common the fact that individuals experience excessive uneasiness and that they worry as a result of perceived (excessive or dangerous) demands that are made on them on an interpersonal level. The anxiety, worry, or tenseness could result in the impairment of social, occupational, physical, and other important areas of functioning. One could also say that individuals experience excessive sensitivity to others' opinions, attitudes, and demands.
The following psychosomatic symptoms might indicate that you are experiencing anxiety, stress, or tension:
The following emotional symptoms could indicate that you are experiencing anxiety, stress, or tension:
The following intellectual symptoms might indicate that you are experiencing anxiety, stress, or tension:
Very often people who experience stress are inclined to shy away from interpersonal contact and are thus inclined to bottle up feelings instead of sharing them with others. This bottling up of feelings and the corresponding tension can lead to psychosomatic symptoms such as heart problems, headaches, diarrhoea, impotence, and asthma.
When you experience tension or anxiety, usually your sleeping, sex, and eating patterns are disturbed. Your need for sex might be diminished or you could experience an excessive need for it to comfort you. You also might not feel hungry. In an attempt to overcome anxiety or tension you might resort to excessive smoking, sleeping, and drinking When stress is prevalent, depression is underlying or dormant. Once you give up handling and competing with the problems creating stress, depression sets in. What can we do about it if we experience stress and anxiety and underlying depression?
Peter discovered that he was in debt. This realisation made it impossible for him to sleep. He became very anxious and depressed and wanted to commit suicide. He complained about it to a good friend. The friend listened patiently as Peter told him of all his problems, but when he replied, he made no mention of the debts.
This surprised Peter very much. Instead of discussing the debts, the friend talked about what Peter owned, his money, and the friends who were ready to help him. Suddenly the disturbed Peter saw his problems in a new light. He stopped wasting his energy on problems and debts and concentrated on the abilities he had. He then discovered that he had enough power and resources to solve his problem.
This story shows us that a healthy person is not free of problems, but one who deals with them. One day's happiness can make a person forget his/her misfortune, and one day's misfortune can make a person forget his/her past happiness.
Anxiety or stress implies an over-sensitivity to others' opinions, attitudes and demands. It is the meaning that you attach to significant other people’s opinions, attitudes, and demands that bring about the tension. This being the case, then surely communication between the concerned parties should alleviate the matter.
It sounds easy enough but we all have reservations about communicating matters of a personal nature. We always think: "What will he think of me if I told him this problem that I experience", or "She would think I am stupid to have such a problem," or "Why can't I just cope with problems like anybody else?" or "I am sure I am the only one with such a problem, nobody will understand me."
Most emotional problems are related to the perceptions and expectations we have of other people. The questions above confirm this view. One could thus also say that in one’s (subjective) definition of the problem lies the solution to it as well.
To be able to perceive and handle problems effectively, one must also be as physically fit as possible. Tiredness can negatively influence the perception of, a definition of and possible solution to a problem. The problem may then be perceived as overwhelming and insoluble.
The solution to a problem lies in its meaning, perception, and definition. If you define a problem as overwhelming, it will appear insoluble. Furthermore, if you think about a problem on your own, you will only have one point of view.
In the example earlier, Peter's friend introduced a different perspective, and by implication, a (different) solution to the problem.
When a person falls ill in the West, they say he or she must have a rest. They are visited by a few people and visits are socially controlled. In the East, when a person falls ill, their bed is placed in the living room. The sick person is the centre of attention and is visited by many family members and friends. If visitors stay away, it is seen as uncivil. In this way relationships are confirmed. In the West, relationships are often severed when a person becomes ill and the sick person is forgotten at their office until they return. They do not experience being missed by colleagues and friends.
So, if you find it difficult to talk to someone about your problems or negative experiences, find a psychologist or a good friend and start to practice talking to them first. Maybe that will give you enough courage to talk to others as well. By sharing a problem and feeling understood, the impact of a problem can be alleviated. There is a saying: "Nature is explained, but people are understood". There is no need for you to ever explain your behaviour if you feel you have done the best you can. We only need to understand each other.
People often ask whether or not it may be simpler to take a tranquilliser to alleviate the anxiety or tension. There are times when medication may come in handy on a short-term basis. When a loved one dies and you find it difficult to cope with the emotional impact of this, then medication could be a blessing that helps to cope with a temporary and tense situation.
Feeling tense can be compared to the waves of the sea. You are not equally tense at all times, just as the intensity of the waves differs at different times. The medication cuts out peak emotional experiences so that you do not experience them as so overwhelming. The "wave" of emotion can thus not develop fully under the influence of medication and in this way you are protected for as long as you take it. But can you carry on taking the medication forever? Would it not be better to learn how to surf, so that you can ride the waves of emotion when they come?
For this reason, it is important to talk to as many people as possible about your experiences, especially experts. If you bottle feelings up, you are "freezing" the emotional wave and the body is kept in a state of readiness. The adrenalin is still pumping and the heart rate is still high to keep you in that state of readiness. Also, many of the corresponding symptoms that were mentioned earlier still prevail. The body cannot be kept in a state of readiness indefinitely and something must give. Usually, it is the heart that works the hardest and is the most vulnerable. So, does it pay to bottle up (and freeze emotions)?
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Last modified: 2023/08/07